Review and Reflect Answers From Working With Young Children Chapter 12 Review and Reflect

Affiliate 12. Peer Review and Last Revisions

12.i Revision

Learning Objectives

• Identify major areas of concern in the draft essay during revising
• Utilize peer reviews and checklists to assist revising
• Revise your paper to meliorate system and cohesion
• Determine an advisable style and tone for your paper
• Revise to ensure that your tone is consistent
• Revise the first typhoon of your essay and produce a terminal draft

Revising and editing are the 2 tasks you undertake to significantly improve your essay. Both are very important elements of the writing process. You may think that a completed get-go draft means that little improvement is needed. However, fifty-fifty experienced writers demand to better their drafts and rely on peers during revising and editing. You may know that athletes miss catches, fumble balls, or overshoot goals. Dancers forget steps, plow likewise slowly, or miss beats. For both athletes and dancers, the more they practise, the stronger their performance will become. Web designers seek meliorate images, a more clever design, or a more highly-seasoned groundwork for their web pages. Writing has the same capacity to turn a profit from improvement and revision.

You should revise and edit in stages: do non expect to catch everything in one get. If each time y'all review your essay you lot focus on a unlike aspect of construction, you will exist more likely to take hold of any mistakes or identify any issues. Throughout this chapter, you will meet a number of checklists containing specific things to look for with each revision. For example, y'all will first look at how the overall paper and your ideas are organized.

In the 2d department of this chapter, you volition focus more on editing: correcting the mechanical issues. Also at the stop of the chapter, you will run into a comprehensive merely more general list of things you should be looking for.

Agreement the Purpose of Revising and Editing

Revising and editing allow you to examine 2 important aspects of your writing separately, and so that you can give each task your undivided attention.

When yous revise , you accept a 2d wait at your ideas. You might add, cut, motion, or change information in order to make your ideas clearer, more authentic, more interesting, or more disarming.

When y'all edit , you take a second await at how you expressed your ideas. You add or alter words. Yous fix whatever problems in grammar, punctuation, and judgement structure. You ameliorate your writing style. You make your essay into a polished, mature slice of writing, the terminate production of your best efforts.

Tip

How exercise you lot get the best out of your revisions and editing? Here are some strategies that writers take developed to look at their first drafts from a fresh perspective. Endeavour them throughout the writing process; then go on using the ones that bring results.

Take a break. You are proud of what you wrote, but you might be also close to it to make changes. Set bated your writing for a few hours or even a solar day until you can look at information technology considerately.

Ask someone y'all trust for feedback and constructive criticism.

Pretend y'all are ane of your readers. Are yous satisfied or dissatisfied? Why?

For many people, the wordscritic,critical, andcriticism provoke only negative feelings that make them blush, grumble, or shout. However, as a writer and a thinker, you need to larn to be critical of yourself in a positive way and accept high expectations for your work. You lot too need to train your eye and trust your ability to fix what needs fixing. To practise this, yous need to teach yourself where to wait.

Revising Your Paper: Organization , Cohesion , and Unity

When writing a research paper, it is piece of cake to become overly focused on editorial details, such as the proper format for bibliographical entries. These details do matter. However, earlier you begin to address them, it is of import to spend time reviewing and revising the content of the paper.

A good inquiry newspaper is both organized and cohesive.Organization ways that your statement flows logically from one point to the side by side.Cohesion means that the elements of your paper piece of work together smoothly and naturally. In a cohesive enquiry paper, information from research is seamlessly integrated with the author'southward ideas.

Revise to Ameliorate Organization

When you lot revise to improve arrangement, y'all look at the flow of ideas throughout the essay as a whole and within individual paragraphs. Yous check to encounter that your essay moves logically from the introduction to the trunk paragraphs to the conclusion, and that each section reinforces your thesis. Employ Checklist 12.1 : Revise for Arrangement to assist you.

Checklist 12.1 : Revise for Organization

At the essay level

Does my introduction go on clearly from the opening to the thesis?

Does each torso paragraph accept a clear main thought that relates to the thesis?

Do the main ideas in the body paragraphs menses in a logical lodge? Is each paragraph connected to the one before it?

Do I need to add together or revise topic sentences or transitions to brand the overall flow of ideas clearer?

Does my conclusion summarize my principal ideas and revisit my thesis?

At the paragraph level

Does the topic judgement clearly state the principal idea?

Exercise the details in the paragraph chronicle to the main idea?

Exercise I need to recast whatever sentences or add together transitions to improve the flow of sentences?

Jorge reread his draft paragraph by paragraph. As he read, he highlighted the main thought of each paragraph so he could come across whether his ideas proceeded in a logical order. For the most office, the flow of ideas was clear. However, he did find that one paragraph did not have a clear primary thought. It interrupted the flow of the writing. During revision, Jorge added a topic sentence that clearly connected the paragraph to the one that had preceded it. He also added transitions to improve the menstruum of ideas from sentence to judgement.

Read the post-obit paragraphs twice, the first time without Jorge's changes, and the second time with them.

Cocky – exercise EXERCISE 12.1

Follow these steps to begin revising your paper'south overall arrangement.

Print out a hard copy of your paper. (You will use this for multiple self-exercise exercises in this chapter.)

Read your paper paragraph by paragraph. Highlight your thesis and the topic sentence of each paragraph.

Using the thesis and topic sentences as starting points, outline the ideas you presented—just as you would practise if y'all were outlining a chapter in a textbook. Practice not expect at the outline you lot created during prewriting. You may write in the margins of your draft or create a formal outline on a dissever sheet of paper.

Adjacent, reread your paper more slowly, looking for how ideas flow from sentence to sentence. Identify places where adding a transition or recasting a sentence would brand the ideas period more than logically.

Review the topics on your outline. Is there a logical flow of ideas? Place any places where y'all may need to reorganize ideas.

Brainstorm to revise your newspaper to improve organization. Kickoff with any major issues, such as needing to move an unabridged paragraph. Then proceed to minor revisions, such as adding a transitional phrase or tweaking a topic judgement and so it connects ideas more than clearly.

Optional collaboration: P lease share your paper with a classmate. Repeat the six steps and accept notes on a split up piece of newspaper. Share and compare notes.

Tip

Writers choose transitions carefully to show the relationships between ideas—for case, to make a comparison or elaborate on a point with examples. Make certain your transitions suit your purpose and avoid overusing the aforementioned ones.

Creating Coherence

Careful writers use transitions to clarify how the ideas in their sentences and paragraphs are related. These words and phrases help the writing flow smoothly. Calculation transitions is not the only manner to improve coherence, merely they are often useful and give a mature feel to your essays. Earlier chapters have discussed using transitions for specific purposes in the planning of your writing.Table 12.1: Common Transitional Words and Phrases groups many mutual transitions according to their purpose.

Table 12.i: Common Transitional Words and Phrases According to Purpose

Transitions That Evidence Sequence or Fourth dimension
after	before	afterwards
later on	before long	meanwhile
equally shortly equally	finally	side by side
at first	first, second, 3rd	presently
at concluding	in the beginning place	then
Transitions That Show Position
above	across	at the lesser
at the height	behind	below
beside	beyond	inside
near	next to	opposite
to the left, to the right, to the side	under	where
Transitions That Show a Conclusion
indeed	hence	in determination
in the final analysis	therefore	thus
Transitions That Continue a Line of Idea
consequently	furthermore	additionally
considering	besides the fact	following this idea further
in addition	in the aforementioned manner	moreover
looking further	considering…, it is clear that
Transitions That Change a Line of Idea
simply	withal	even so
nevertheless	on the contrary	on the other hand
Transitions That Show Importance
to a higher place all	best	peculiarly
in fact	more than of import	>most of import
most	worst
Transitions That Innovate the Last Thoughts in a Paragraph or Essay
finally	concluding	in decision
most of all	least of all	last of all
All Purpose Transitions to Open Paragraphs or to Connect Ideas Inside Paragraphs
absolutely	at this point	certainly
granted	it is true	mostly speaking
in general	in this situation	no doubt
no one denies	obviously	of course
to exist sure	undoubtedly	unquestionably
Transitions that Innovate Examples
for instance	for instance	such as
Transitions That Clarify the Lodge of Events or Steps
starting time, second, tertiary	generally, furthermore, finally	in the beginning place, also, last
in the first place, furthermore, finally	in the offset place, likewise, lastly

When Mariah (who y'all were introduced to in Capacity v and 6) revised her essay for unity, she examined her paragraph nearly televisions to check for coherence. She looked for places where she needed to add a transition or perhaps reword the text to brand the menstruum of ideas articulate. In the version that follows, she has already deleted the sentences that were off topic.

Tip

Many writers make their revisions on a printed copy and then transfer them to the version on screen. They conventionally apply a small-scale pointer called a caret (^) to show where to insert an addition or correction.

Self – practice EXERCISE 12.two

Answer the following questions nearly Mariah's revised paragraph.

Do yous agree with the transitions and other changes that Mariah fabricated to her paragraph? Which would you keep and which were unnecessary? Explicate.

What transition words or phrases did Mariah add to her paragraph? Why did she cull each i?

What effect does adding additional sentences take on the coherence of the paragraph? Explicate. When you read both versions aloud, which version has a more than logical period of ideas? Explicate.

Revise to Ameliorate Cohesion

When yous revise to improve cohesion, you analyze how the parts of your paper work together. You look for anything that seems awkward or out of place. Revision may involve deleting unnecessary textile or rewriting parts of the paper and then that the out of identify material fits in smoothly.

In a research newspaper, problems with cohesion usually occur when a writer has trouble integrating source material. If facts or quotations have been awkwardly dropped into a paragraph, they distract or confuse the reader instead of working to support the writer'southward signal. Overusing paraphrased and quoted material has the same effect. Use Checklist 12.2 : Revise for Cohesion to review your essay for cohesion.

Checklist 12.2 : Revise for Cohesion

Does the opening of the newspaper clearly connect to the broader topic and thesis? Make sure entertaining quotes or anecdotes serve a purpose.

Accept I included support from research for each main signal in the torso of my paper?

Have I included introductory fabric before any quotations? Quotations should never stand solitary in a paragraph.

Does paraphrased and quoted material conspicuously serve to develop my ain points?

Do I need to add to or revise parts of the paper to aid the reader understand how certain information from a source is relevant?

Are in that location any places where I have overused material from sources?

Does my determination brand sense based on the rest of the paper? Brand sure whatever new questions or suggestions in the conclusion are clearly linked to earlier cloth.

As Jorge reread his draft, he looked to see how the unlike pieces fit together to prove his thesis. He realized that some of his supporting information needed to be integrated more advisedly and decided to omit some details entirely. Read the following paragraph, outset without Jorge's revisions and then with them.

Jorge decided that his comment well-nigh pizza and birthday block came across as subjective and was not necessary to make his indicate, so he deleted it. He also realized that the quotation at the cease of the paragraph was awkward and ineffective. How would his readers know who Kwon was or why her opinion should exist taken seriously? Adding an introductory phrase helped Jorge integrate this quotation smoothly and establish the credibility of his source.

Self – do EXERCISE 12.three

Follow these steps to begin revising your newspaper to improve cohesion.

Print out a difficult re-create of your paper, or work with your printout fromSelf – Practice Exercise 12.1.

Read the trunk paragraphs of your newspaper first. Each time you come to a place that cites data from sources, inquire yourself what purpose this data serves. Check that it helps support a point and that it is clearly related to the other sentences in the paragraph.

Identify unnecessary information from sources that yous can delete.

Identify places where yous need to revise your writing then that readers empathise the significance of the details cited from sources.

Skim the torso paragraphs once more than, looking for whatever paragraphs that seem packed with citations. Review these paragraphs carefully for cohesion.

Review your introduction and decision. Make sure the information presented works with ideas in the body of the paper.

Revise the places you identified in your paper to improve cohesion.

Optional c ollaboration: P lease commutation papers with a classmate. Complete step 4 . On a separate piece of paper, note any areas that would benefit from clarification. Render and compare notes.

Writing at Work

Understanding cohesion tin can also benefit you in the workplace, especially when you take to write and deliver a presentation. Speakers sometimes rely on cute graphics or funny quotations to hold their audience's attention. If you lot cull to use these elements, make sure they work well with the substantive content of your presentation. For example, if you are asked to give a financial presentation, and the financial written report shows that the company lost coin, funny illustrations would not be relevant or appropriate for the presentation.

Tip

Reading your writing aloud will often help you find problems with unity and coherence. Listen for the clarity and flow of your ideas. Place places where you lot find yourself confused, and write a annotation to yourself virtually possible fixes.

Creating Unity

Sometimes writers get caught up in the moment and cannot resist a good digression. Even though y'all might enjoy such detours when yous chat with friends, unplanned digressions usually harm a piece of writing.

Following your outline closely offers you lot a reasonable guarantee that your writing will stay on purpose and not migrate away from the decision-making thought. However, when writers are rushed, are tired, or cannot observe the right words, their writing may go less than they want it to exist. Their writing may no longer exist clear and concise, and they may add information that is not needed to develop the primary idea.

When a piece of writing hasunity, all the ideas in each paragraph and in the entire essay clearly belong and are arranged in an order that makes logical sense. When the writing hascoherence, the ideas flow smoothly. The wording clearly indicates how i idea leads to another within a paragraph and from paragraph to paragraph.

Mariah stayed close to her outline when she drafted the three body paragraphs of her essay she tentatively titled "Digital Technology: The Newest and the Best at What Price?" But a recent shopping trip for an HDTV upset her enough that she digressed from the principal topic of her third paragraph and included comments virtually the sales staff at the electronics shop she visited. When she revised her essay, she deleted the off-topic sentences that affected the unity of the paragraph.

Read the following paragraph twice, the starting time time without Mariah's changes and the 2d time with them.

Self – do Practice 12.iv

Reply the post-obit two questions about Mariah's paragraph:

Practice you agree with Mariah'southward conclusion to make the deletions she fabricated? Did she cut too much, likewise little, or just plenty? Explain.

Is the explanation of what screen resolution means a digression? Or is it audience friendly and essential to agreement the paragraph? Explain.

Collaboration: P lease share with a classmate and compare your answers.

Now, print out another copy of your essay or use the printed version(south) you used in Self – Exercise Exercises 12.1 and 12.3 . Reread it to find any statements that bear upon the unity of your writing. Determine how best to revise.

Tip

When you reread your writing to observe revisions to make, expect for each blazon of trouble in a separate sweep. Read it straight through once to locate whatsoever problems with unity. Read information technology straight through a 2d time to find problems with coherence. You may follow this aforementioned practice during many stages of the writing process.

Writing at Work

Many companies hire copy editors and proofreaders to help them produce the cleanest possible final drafts of large writing projects. Copy editors are responsible for suggesting revisions and style changes; proofreaders check documents for whatever errors in capitalization, spelling, and punctuation that take crept in. Many times, these tasks are done on a freelance ground, with one freelancer working for a diverseness of clients.

Using a Consistent Style and Tone

Once you lot are certain that the content of your paper fulfills your purpose, y'all can brainstorm revising to amendstyle andtone. Together, your style and tone create the voice of your paper, or how yous come up beyond to readers. Mode refers to the way you utilize language as a writer—the sentence structures you lot use and the give-and-take choices y'all make. Tone is the attitude toward your subject and audience that yous convey through your word option.

Determining an Appropriate Manner and Tone

Although accepted writing styles will vary within different disciplines, the underlying goal is the same—to meet to your readers every bit a knowledgeable, authoritative guide. Writing nigh research is like being a bout guide who walks readers through a topic. A stuffy, overly formal bout guide can make readers feel put off or intimidated. Likewise much informality or humor tin make readers wonder whether the tour guide actually knows what he or she is talking about. Extreme or emotionally charged language comes across as unbalanced.

To help prevent existence overly formal or breezy, decide an appropriate style and tone at the offset of the inquiry process. Consider your topic and audition because these can aid dictate style and tone. For example, a paper on new breakthroughs in cancer research should be more formal than a newspaper on ways to get a skilful night's sleep.

A strong research paper comes across as straightforward, appropriately academic, and serious. Information technology is generally all-time to avoid writing in the offset person, every bit this tin make your newspaper seem overly subjective and opinion based. Use Checklist 12.3 : Revise for Style to review your paper for other bug that touch mode and tone. You tin can check for consistency at the finish of the writing process. Checking for consistency is discussed subsequently in this section.

Checklist 12.three : Revise for Way

My paper avoids excessive wordiness.

My sentences are varied in length and structure.

I have avoided using first person pronouns such as I and nosotros.

I have used the active voice whenever possible.

I take divers specialized terms that might be unfamiliar to readers.

I have used articulate, straightforward linguistic communication whenever possible and avoided unnecessary jargon.

My paper states my indicate of view using a balanced tone—neither too indecisive nor too forceful.

Discussion Choice

Note that word pick is an especially of import aspect of manner. In addition to checking the points noted on Checklist 12.iii, review your newspaper to brand sure your language is precise, conveys no unintended connotations, and is complimentary of bias. Hither are some of the points to check for:

Vague or imprecise terms

Slang

Repetition of the same phrases ("Smith states…, Jones states…") to introduce quoted and paraphrased material (For a full list of potent verbs to use with in text citations, run acrossChapter 9: Citations and Referencing.)

Exclusive apply of masculine pronouns or awkward use ofhe or she

Use of linguistic communication with negative connotations, such every bit haughty or ridiculous

Apply of outdated or offensive terms to refer to specific indigenous, racial, or religious groups

Tip

Using plural nouns and pronouns or recasting a judgement can assist you keep your language gender neutral while avoiding clumsiness. Consider the post-obit examples.

• Gender biased : When a writer cites a source in the body of his newspaper, he must list it on his references page.
• Awkward : When a writer cites a source in the torso of his or her newspaper, he or she must list it on his or her references page.
• Improved : Writers must list any sources cited in the torso of a newspaper on the references page.

Keeping Your Style Consequent

Equally you lot revise your newspaper, make sure your style is consequent throughout. Await for instances where a word, phrase, or judgement does not seem to fit with the rest of the writing. It is best to reread for style after you accept completed the other revisions so that you are non distracted by any larger content issues. Revising strategies you can use include the following:

Read your paper aloud. Sometimes your ears take hold of inconsistencies that your eyes miss.

Share your newspaper with another reader whom you trust to give you honest feedback. It is often difficult to evaluate one'southward ain style objectively—specially in the terminal phase of a challenging writing projection. Another reader may exist more likely to discover instances of wordiness, confusing language, or other problems that bear upon style and tone.

E dit your newspaper slowly, sentence past sentence. You may even wish to utilise a sheet of paper to embrace up everything on the page except the paragraph you lot are editing. This practice forces you to read slowly and carefully. Marker any areas where yous notice problems in way or tone, and and so accept fourth dimension to rework those sections.

On reviewing his paper, Jorge plant that he had more often than not used an appropriately academic manner and tone. All the same, he noticed ane glaring exception—his first paragraph. He realized there were places where his overly informal writing could come across as unserious or, worse, disparaging. Revising his word choice and omitting a humorous aside helped Jorge maintain a consequent tone. Read his revisions.

Cocky – practise EXERCISE 12.5

Using Checklist 12.iii : Revise for Manner , revise your newspaper line by line. You may employ either of these techniques:

Print out a hard copy of your paper or piece of work with your printout fromSelf – Practice Exercise 12.1. Read information technology line by line. Check for the issues noted on Checklist 12.3, besides as any other aspects of your writing style you have previously identified as areas for improvement. Mark whatsoever areas where yous notice problems in style or tone, and then take time to rework those sections.

If you prefer to work with an electronic certificate, use the menu options in your give-and-take processing program to enlarge the text to 150 or 200 percent of the original size. Make certain the type is large enough that yous tin focus on one paragraph at a time. Read the paper line past line as described in step 1. Highlight any areas where you detect problems in fashion or tone, and and then take fourth dimension to rework those sections.

Optional c ollaboration: P charter exchange papers with a classmate. On a separate slice of newspaper, note places where the essay does not seem to flow or you accept questions about what was written. Return the essay and compare notes.

Completing a Peer Review

After working so closely with a piece of writing, writers frequently need to step back and enquire for a more objective reader. What writers need most is feedback from readers who can answer only to the words on the page. When they are fix, writers prove their drafts to someone they respect and who can give an honest response about its strengths and weaknesses.

You, too, tin ask a peer to read your draft when it is gear up. After evaluating the feedback and assessing what is about helpful, the reader's feedback will help y'all when you revise your draft. This process is calledpeer review.

Y'all tin can work with a partner in your course and identify specific means to strengthen each other's essays. Although you may exist uncomfortable sharing your writing at first, remember that each writer is working toward the same goal: a final draft that fits the audience and the purpose. Maintaining a positive attitude when providing feedback volition put yous and your partner at ease. The box that follows provides a useful framework for the peer review session.

Questions for Peer Review: Organization, Unity, and Coherence

Title of essay: ____________________________________________

Engagement: ____________________________________________

Writer'south proper noun: ____________________________________________

Peer reviewer'south name: _________________________________________

This essay is about____________________________________________.

Your principal points in this essay are____________________________________________.

What I most liked nigh this essay is____________________________________________.

These iii points struck me as your strongest:

Point: ____________________________________________
Why: ____________________________________________

Indicate: ____________________________________________
Why: ____________________________________________

Point: ____________________________________________
Why: ____________________________________________

These places in your essay are not clear to me:

Where: ____________________________________________
Needs improvement because__________________________________________

Where: ____________________________________________
Needs improvement considering ____________________________________________

Where: ____________________________________________

Needs improvement because ____________________________________________

The one boosted change you could make that would meliorate this essay significantly is ____________________________________________.

Writing at Piece of work

One of the reasons why discussion processing programs build in a reviewing feature is that piece of work groups have become a common characteristic in many businesses. Writing is often collaborative, and the members of a work grouping and their supervisors often critique group members' work and offer feedback that volition lead to a amend last production.

Self – do EXERCISE 12.six

Exchange essays with a classmate and complete a peer review of each other's typhoon in progress. Remember to give positive feedback and to be courteous and polite in your responses. Focus on providing one positive annotate and one question for more information to the author.

Using Feedback Objectively

The purpose of peer feedback is to receive constructive criticism of your essay. Your peer reviewer is your first real audition, and you have the opportunity to acquire what confuses and delights a reader so that you can improve your work before sharing the concluding draft with a wider audition (or your intended audience).

It may not be necessary to incorporate every recommendation your peer reviewer makes. Nonetheless, if you lot commencement to detect a pattern in the responses you receive from peer reviewers, y'all might want to consider that feedback in future assignments. For case, if y'all read consequent comments about a need for more research, and so yous may want to consider including more than research in future assignments.

Using Feedback from Multiple Sources

You might get feedback from more than than one reader as you share different stages of your revised draft. In this state of affairs, you may receive feedback from readers who exercise not understand the assignment or who lack your involvement with and enthusiasm for information technology.

You need to evaluate the responses you receive co-ordinate to two of import criteria:

Make up one's mind if the feedback supports the purpose of the consignment.

Determine if the suggested revisions are appropriate to the audience.

Then, using these standards, accept or pass up revision feedback.

Self – practise EXERCISE 12.7

Consider the feedback you received from the peer review and all of the revision exercises throughout this department. Compile a final draft of your revisions that y'all can utilise in the adjacent section to complete your final edits.

Key Takeaways

• Revising and editing are the stages of the writing procedure in which you improve your work before producing a final draft.
• Unity in writing means that all the ideas in each paragraph and in the entire essay clearly belong together and are arranged in an order that makes logical sense.
• Coherence in writing ways that the writer's diction clearly indicates how ane idea leads to some other within a paragraph and between paragraphs.
• Transitional words and phrases finer make writing more coherent.
• Writing should be clear and concise, with no unnecessary words.
• Effective formal writing uses specific, appropriate words and avoids slang, contractions, clichés, and overly general words.
• Peer reviews, done properly, can give writers objective feedback about their writing. It is the author'south responsibility to evaluate the results of peer reviews and incorporate merely useful feedback.

12.2 Editing and Developing a Final Typhoon of a Inquiry Paper

Learning Objectives

• Edit your paper to ensure that language, citations, and formatting are right

Given all the time and try you have put into your research paper, you will desire to make sure that your concluding draft represents your all-time piece of work. This requires taking the time to revise and edit your paper carefully.

You may feel like you need a break from your paper before you edit it. That feeling is understandable, and so you desire to be sure to leave yourself enough time to consummate this of import phase of the writing procedure. This department presents a number of opportunities for you to focus on different aspects of the editing process; every bit with revising a draft, you should arroyo editing in different stages.

Some of the content in this department may seem repetitive, but again, it provides you with a chance to double-bank check whatever revisions y'all accept fabricated at a detailed level.

Editing Your Draft

If you accept been incorporating each set of revisions equally Mariah and Jorge have, you have produced multiple drafts of your writing. So far, all your changes have been content changes. Possibly with the assist of peer feedback, you have fabricated sure that you sufficiently supported your ideas. Yous have checked for problems with unity and coherence. You accept examined your essay for word option, revising to cut unnecessary words and to supercede weak diction with specific and appropriate wording.

The next step after revising the content is editing. When you edit, you examine the surface features of your text. You examine your spelling, grammer, usage, and punctuation. You also brand certain you use the proper format when creating your finished assignment.

Tip

Editing takes time. Be sure to budget time into the writing process to complete additional edits afterward revising. Editing and proofreading your writing helps yous create a finished work that represents your best efforts. Here are a few more tips to remember well-nigh your readers:

Readers do non find right spelling, just theypractise discover misspellings.

Readers look past your sentences to get to your ideas—unless the sentences are awkward, poorly constructed, and frustrating to read.

Readers notice when every sentence has the same rhythm as every other sentence, with no variety.

Readers exercise not cheer when you utilisethere,their, andthey're correctly, merely they notice when yous do not.

Readers volition notice the intendance with which y'all handled your assignment and your attention to detail in the commitment of an error-costless document.

Being Clear and Concise

Some writers are very methodical and painstaking when they write a first typhoon. Other writers unleash a lot of words in order to get out all that they experience they demand to say. Do either of these methods match your style? Or is your composing style somewhere in betwixt? No matter which description all-time fits you, the get-go typhoon of almost every piece of writing, no thing its author, can be made clearer and more curtailed.

If you lot have a tendency to write too much, you volition need to look for unnecessary words. If yous have a tendency to exist vague or imprecise in your diction, you will need to discover specific words to replace any overly full general language.

Identifying Wordiness

Sometimes writers use too many words when fewer words will appeal more to their audience and ameliorate fit their purpose. Hither are some mutual examples of wordiness to look for in your typhoon. Eliminating wordiness helps all readers, because it makes your ideas clear, direct, and straightforward.

• Sentences that begin withThere isorThere are
• Wordy . There are two major experiments that the Biology Department sponsors.
• Revised . The Biology Department sponsors 2 major experiments.
• Sentences with unnecessary modifiers
• Wordy . 2 extremely famous and well-known consumer advocates spoke eloquently in favour of the proposed important legislation.
• Revised . Two well-known consumer advocates spoke in favour of the proposed legislation.

Sentences with deadwood phrases that add little to the meaning. Be judicious when y'all use phrases such equallyin terms of,with a listen to,on the subject area of,every bit to whether or not,more or less,equally far every bit…is concerned, and similar expressions. You tin can commonly find a more than straightforward way to country your point.

• Wordy . Every bit a earth leader in the field of light-green engineering, the company plans to focus its efforts in the expanse of geothermal free energy. A report equally to whether or not to utilize geysers equally an free energy source is in the process of grooming.
• Revised . As a world leader in green technology, the company plans to focus on geothermal energy. Researchers are preparing a report well-nigh using geysers every bit an energy source.

Sentences in the passive voice or with forms of the verbto be : Sentences with passive vocalism verbs ofttimes create defoliation because the subject of the sentence does not perform an action. Sentences are clearer when the subject performs the activeness and is followed by a strong verb. Use strong active vox verbs in place of forms ofto be, which can lead to wordiness. Avert passive vocalism when you lot can.

• Wordy . It might perhaps be said that using a GPS device is something that is a benefit to drivers who accept a poor sense of management.
• Revised . Using a GPS device benefits drivers who accept a poor sense of direction.

Sentences with constructions that can be shortened

• Wordy . The e-volume reader, which is a recent invention, may become as commonplace as the prison cell telephone. My over-60 uncle bought an e-book reader, and his wife bought an e-book reader, likewise.
• Revised . The e-book reader, a recent invention, may become as commonplace as the jail cell telephone. My over-lx uncle and his wife both bought e-book readers.

Choosing Specific, Appropriate Words

Well-nigh essays at the mail service-secondary level should be written in formal English suitable for an academic situation. Follow these principles to be certain that your word choice is advisable. For more than information about word pick, encounterAffiliate 2: Working with Words: Which Word Is Right?

Avoid slang . Find alternatives tobummer,kewl, andrad.

Avert language that is overly casual . Write about "men and women" rather than "girls and guys" unless you lot are trying to create a specific effect. A formal tone calls for formal language.

Avoid contractions . Usedo not in place ofdon't,I am in place ofI'm,take not in identify ofoasis't, and so on. Contractions are considered coincidental speech.

Avoid clichés . Overused expressions such asgreen with envy,face the music,better belatedly than never, and similar expressions are empty of meaning and may not appeal to your audience.

Be conscientious when you employ words that sound alike but have different meanings . Some examples areallusion/illusion; complement/compliment; council/counsel; concurrent/consecutive; founder/flounder; and celebrated/historical. When in doubt, bank check a dictionary.

Choose words with the connotations y'all want . Choosing a word for its connotations is as important in formal essay writing as information technology is in all kinds of writing. Compare the positive connotations of the wordproud and the negative connotations ofarrogant andconceited.

Use specific words rather than overly general words . Find synonyms forthing,people,dainty,good,bad,interesting, and other vague words. Or use specific details to make your exact significant articulate.

Now read the revisions Mariah made to brand her third paragraph clearer and more curtailed. She has already incorporated the changes she made to improve unity and coherence.

Self – practise Practise 12.8

Answer the post-obit questions almost Mariah's revised paragraph:

Read the unrevised and the revised paragraphs aloud. Explicate in your own words how changes in word choice take affected Mariah's writing.

Practice y'all agree with the changes that Mariah fabricated to her paragraph? Which changes would you keep and which were unnecessary? Explain. What other changes would you have fabricated?

What effect does removing contractions and the pronoun ^{you lot} take on the tone of the paragraph? How would you characterize the tone now? Why?

Now return once more to your essay in progress. Read advisedly for problems with word choice. Be certain that your draft is written in formal language and that your word option is specific and appropriate.

Self – practice Practice 12.9

R eturn one time more to the beginning draft of the essay you have been revising. Bank check information technology for unnecessary words.

Try making your sentences equally curtailed every bit they tin can be.

Brief Punctuation Review

Throughout this book, y'all accept been presented with a number of tables containing transitional words. Tabular array 12.2: Punctuating Transitional Words and Phrases shows many of the transition words y'all accept seen organized into different categories to assistance y'all know how to punctuate with each one.

Table 12.2: Punctuating Transitional Words and Phrases

Joining Independent Clauses (coordination)
2 IND	Coordinating conjunctions: FANBOYS		Conjunctive adverbs and other transitional expressions
IND ; IND	IND , ____ IND		IND . _____, IND or IND ; _____, IND
	for		appropriately		after all
	and		after a while		also
	nor		anyway		as a consequence
	but		at any rate		at the same fourth dimension
	or		besides		consequently
	yet		for instance		for case
	so		furthermore		hence
			henceforth		however
			in addition		indeed
			in fact		in other words
			in particular		instead
			in the first place		likewise
			meanwhile		moreover
			still		withal
			on the contrary		on the other hand
			otherwise		notwithstanding
			then		therefore
			thus
Forming Dependent Clauses (subordination)
IND + DEP or DEP , IND
after	although	as		as if		as though
because	before	if		in order that		since
so that	that	though		unless		until
when	whenever	where		wherever
*which	while	who		whom		whose

* This row contains relative pronouns, which may be punctuated differently.

Joining Independent Clauses

There are three ways to bring together contained clauses. By using a mix of all three methods and varying your transition words, y'all will add complication to your writing and improve the flow. You lot will also exist emphasizing to your reader which ideas you want to connect or to show things similar crusade and consequence or dissimilarity. For a more than detailed review of independent clauses, wait back at Chapter 3: Putting Ideas into Your Ain Words and Paragraphs. Pick 1 By simply using a semicolon (;), yous can make the ideas connect more than than if yous were to use a period. If you are trying to reinforce that connection, use a semicolon considering information technology is not as strong of a break as a period and reinforces the link. Option 2 When you want to link two contained sentences and increase the flow between ideas, you can add a comma and a coordinating conjunction betwixt them. With analogous conjunctions (FANBOYS: for, and, nor, but, or, however, and then), you do not use a comma every time: you would only exercise so if what is on either side of the conjunction is a complete sentence not just a phrase. Yous would not put a comma if you lot are only giving a list of two items. For case:

Comma:It is common cold outside, and then I wore an extra warm glaze.

No comma: Information technology is cold outside. I wore an extra warm coat and gloves.

The start example contains a complete sentence (independent clause) on either side of the conjunction so. Just the conjunction by itself or just a comma by itself is non stiff enough to join ii independent clauses. Nevertheless, if you put the ii together with so, you tin can link the two. In the 2nd example, and is simply connecting ii noun phrases: warm coat and gloves. What comes after the conjunction is not a complete judgement, so you lot would not add a comma. To check if there is a complete, independent clause, inquire yourself, "Can that office stand by itself as a complete judgement?" In the case of the no comma case, gloves is what comes afterwards the comma. That is not a complete sentence, only a noun: that ways information technology is function of a listing and is non a consummate sentence = no comma. The bespeak of these examples was to show you that you have to be careful how you use commas and conjunctions. Every bit easy as it would be to just ever toss in a comma, doing so would confuse your reader as what is and is not part of a list and what ideas are joined. Choice 3 Your third choice is to join two contained clauses with a conjunctive adverb or another transition word. These words are very useful because they clearly show your reader how you would like your ideas to connect. If y'all wanted to emphasize contrasting ideas, you would use on the other hand or however. If you wanted to evidence cause and result, yous could use as a result. Refer to the tables you have seen in other capacity to make certain you are using the transitions you lot really mean to be using; so, check Table 12.two to confirm how you should punctuate information technology. After your first independent clause, you lot can choose to either use a period or a semicolon, over again depending on how much of a link you want to show. You lot may also want to consider how many long sentences you have used prior to this. If you use a lot of complicated sentences, you should probably use a period to allow your reader to take a break. You must also remember to include a comma subsequently the transition word.

Period:It is cold exterior. Therefore, I wore an actress warm coat.

Semicolon: It is cold outside; therefore, I wore an extra warm glaze.

Joining Dependent Clauses

If one of the clauses in a sentence is contained and tin stand on its ain, merely the other is not, y'all take to construct the sentence a little differently. Whenever you add together a subordinating conjunction or relative pronoun to an contained sentence, you create a dependent clause—one that can never stand alone. In the examples beneath, notice that when the independent clause comes starting time, it is potent enough to conduct the dependent clause at the cease without whatsoever helping punctuation. Still, if you desire the dependent clause first, you must add together a comma between it and the independent clause: the dependent clause is non strong enough to support the contained clause later on without a little help. In the examples below, the independent clauses are double underlined and the dependent clause has a single underline.

IND first:I wore an extra warm coat as it is cold outside.

DEP first: Every bit it is cold outside, I wore an extra warm glaze.

Tip

If you want to start a sentence with Considering, you need to brand sure there is a 2d one-half to that sentence that is independent. A Because (dependent) clause can never stand by itself.

At the lesser on Table 12.two, you can see a list of 5 dependent markers that can be used a lilliputian differently. These are relative pronouns, and when you lot use them, you demand to ask yourself if the data is 100 per centum necessary for the reader to understand what you are describing. If it is optional, you tin include a comma before the relative clause even if it comes after the independent clause.

Non – essential:As it is cold outside, I wore an extra warm coat, which was blue.

Essential: My coat which is bluish is the one I wear when it is really cold outside.

In the non – essential example, the fact that the coat was warm was probably more than important than that the coat was blue. The information that the coat is blue probably would not make a departure in keeping the person warm, then the information in that relative clause is not terribly important. Adding the comma before the clause tells the reader it is extra information. In the essential example, the utilize of the same clause without a preceding comma shows that this data is important. The author is implying he has other coats that are not as warm and are not blue, so he is emphasizing the importance of the blue coat. These are the only five subordinators, or relative pronouns, for which you can do this; every other one needs to follow the previous caption of how to utilize these dependent transition words. If you practise determine to add together a comma with one of the relative pronouns, you need to recollect critically nigh whether or non that description is completely essential.

Using any of these sentence joining strategies is helpful in providing sentence variety to help your reader stay engaged and reading attentively. By following these punctuation rules, you volition also avoid creating sentence fragments, run-on sentences, and comma splices, all of which improves your end product.

Given how much piece of work you accept put into your research paper, you volition want to check for any errors that could distract or confuse your readers. Using the spell checking characteristic in your give-and-take processing plan tin can be helpful, it should not supplant a total, conscientious review of your document. Be certain to bank check for any errors that may have come up up oftentimes for y'all in the past. Employ Checklist 12.iv: Editing Your Writing to help y'all as you edit.

Checklist 12.four : Editing Your Writing

Grammar

Are some sentences actually judgement fragments?

Are some sentences run-on? How can I correct them?

Do some sentences need conjunctions betwixt independent clauses?

Does every verb concur with its bailiwick?

Is every verb in the correct tense?

Are tense forms, peculiarly for irregular verbs, written correctly?

Accept I used subject, object, and possessive personal pronouns correctly?

Have I usedwho andwhom correctly?

Is the antecedent of every pronoun clear?

Do all personal pronouns concord with their antecedents?

Have I used the correct comparative and superlative forms of adjectives and adverbs?

Is information technology clear which word a participial phrase modifies, or is it a dangling modifier?

Sentence Structure

Are all my sentences simple sentences, or do I vary my sentence structure?

Have I chosen the best analogous or subordinating conjunctions to join clauses?

Have I created long, overpacked sentences that should be shortened for clarity?

Do I run into any mistakes in parallel construction?

Punctuation

Does every sentence end with the right end punctuation?

Can I justify the use of every exclamation point?

Have I used apostrophes correctly to write all atypical and plural possessive forms?

Have I used quotation marks correctly?

Mechanics and Usage

Tin can I observe any spelling errors? How can I correct them?

Have I used majuscule letters where they are needed?

Accept I written abbreviations, where allowed, correctly?

Can I find whatsoever errors in the apply of commonly confused words, such as to/as well/two?

Tip

Be conscientious about relying too much on spelling checkers and grammar checkers. A spelling checker cannot recognize that y'all meant to write principle just wroteprincipal instead. A grammar checker often queries constructions that are perfectly right. The programme does not understand your pregnant; it makes its bank check against a general prepare of formulas that might not apply in each instance. If you utilize a grammar checker, take the suggestions that brand sense, but consider why the suggestions came up.

Tip

Proofreading requires patience; it is very easy to read past a fault. Gear up your newspaper aside for at least a few hours, if not a twenty-four hours or more, so your mind will rest. Some professional proofreaders read a text astern so they tin can concentrate on spelling and punctuation. Another helpful technique is to slowly read a paper aloud, paying attention to every discussion, letter, and punctuation marking.

If yous need boosted proofreading help, ask a reliable friend, classmate, or peer tutor to make a last pass on your paper to look for anything you missed.

Formatting

Your finished assignment should be properly formatted, post-obit the mode required of you. Formatting includes the mode of the title, margin size, page number placement, location of the writer's name, and other factors. Your instructor or department may require a specific style to be used. The requirements may be more detailed and rigid for enquiry projects and term papers, which ofttimes find the American Psychological Association (APA) style guide, especially when citations of sources are included.

To ensure the format is correct and follows any specific instructions, make a last check before you submit an assignment.

Self- practice EXERCISE 12.x

With the help of Checklist 12.iv, edit and proofread your essay.

Checking Citations and Formatting

When editing a research paper, information technology is as well of import to check that you have cited sources properly and formatted your certificate according to the specified guidelines. There are two reasons for this. First, citing sources correctly ensures that you give proper credit to other people for ideas and information that helped you in your work. Second, using correct formatting establishes your paper equally one student's contribution to the piece of work adult past and for a larger academic community. Increasingly, American Psychological Association (APA) mode guidelines are the standard for many bookish fields. Use Checklist 12.5: Citations and Formatting to help.

Checklist 12.five : Citations and Formatting

Within the body of my paper, each fact or idea taken from a source is credited to the right source.

Each in-text citation includes the source author's name (or, where applicable, the organisation name or source championship) and yr of publication. I take used the right format of in text and parenthetical citations.

Each source cited in the body of my paper has a corresponding entry in the references department of my paper.

My references department includes a heading and double-spaced alphabetized entries.

Each entry in my references section is indented on the second line and all subsequent lines.

Each entry in my references section includes all the necessary information for that source type, in the correct sequence and format.

My newspaper includes a title page.

My paper includes a running head.

The margins of my paper are ready at one inch. Text is double spaced and set in a standard 12-indicate font.

For detailed guidelines on APA citation and formatting, encounterChapter 9: Citations and Referencing.

Writing at Work

Post-obit APA citation and formatting guidelines may require time and try. Still, it is good do for learning how to follow accepted conventions in whatsoever professional person field. Many large corporations create a fashion manual with guidelines for editing and formatting documents produced by that corporation. Employees follow the mode transmission when creating internal documents and documents for publication.

During the process of revising and editing, Jorge made changes in the content and mode of his paper. He also gave the paper a final review to cheque for overall correctness and, particularly, correct APA citations and formatting. Read the final draft of his paper.

With the help of Checklist 12.5, edit and proofread your essay.

Although you probably do not want to await at your paper over again before you lot submit it to your instructor, accept the time to practise a last check. Since yous have already worked through all of the checklists above focusing on certain aspects at one fourth dimension, working through ane last checklist should confirm you have written a stiff, persuasive essay and that everything is the mode you want it to be. As actress insurance you take produced a strong newspaper, you may fifty-fifty desire someone else to double-bank check your essay using C hecklist 12.half-dozen: Final Revision. And so you can compare to meet how your perceptions of your newspaper lucifer those of someone else, substantially having that person act as the i who will be grading your paper.

Checklist 12.6: Final Revision

First Revision one : System
___	Practise you show you understand the consignment: purpose, audience, and genre?
___	Focus: Have you conspicuously stated your thesis (your controlling thought) in the beginning paragraph?
___	Does your thesis statement catch the reader'southward attention?
___	Unity: Write your opening and closing paragraphs and identify each topic sentence in between. You should have a "mini essay" with several different main points supporting your thesis.
___	Are your paragraphs organized in a logical way?
___ ___	Does each topic sentence (per paragraph) logically follow the one preceding it?
	Do you lot have several points to back up your thesis?
___ ___ ___	Check whether your paragraphs are organized co-ordinate to a specific pattern.
	Would rearranging your paragraphs support your thesis amend?
	Have you lot provided a comprehensive conclusion to your essay? Does information technology summarize your master points (using dissimilar words)?
First Revision two : Paragraphs and Sentences
___ ___ ___ ___ ___   ___ ___ ___   ___   ___	Does each paragraph accept master points and supporting details?
	Does each paragraph have only 1 main point?
	Is your arroyo or blueprint used to develop your paragraph's master point followed?
	Cheque that each sentence is relevant to the main bespeak of the paragraph.
	Are there several sentences giving details, facts, quotes, reasons, and arguments in each paragraph?
	Is each supporting detail specific, concrete, and relevant to the topic judgement?
	Does each sentence logically follow the preceding one?
	Have y'all used transitional words to help the reader follow your thoughts? If non, add together them.
	Paragraph length: If likewise short, develop farther. If too long, break into smaller paragraphs or consolidate some sentences.
	Check your essay for tone and point of view.
Second Revision ane : Sentences and Usage
___ ___ ___ ___	Ostend that each sentence has a subject and a verb.
	Revise fragments, splices, and run-on sentences.
	Cheque modifiers to see if they have been put in unclear places.
	Practise you accept a variety of sentence structures? (elementary and circuitous)
___ ___   ___ ___ ___	Browse for subject area-verb agreement in each sentence.
	Are you consequent with your verb tenses? Check to make sure there are not whatsoever confusing or irrelevant tense changes.
	Brand certain that words in lists are in parallel forms.
	Recollect through your pronouns; what is each 1 referring to?
	Check for confusing "person" shifts inside paragraphs. Keep the subjects consequent.
___ ___ ___ ___   ___	Identify all verbs and modify any that are passive to active.
	Use stiff verbs not weak adverbs. Say something "is" not that it "may be."
	Check for wordiness.
	Browse to make certain you have non used the same word repeatedly in the aforementioned sentence and paragraph. Utilize a thesaurus.
	Look for and eliminate clichés.
Second Revision 2 : Documentation
___ ___ ___ ___	Have you documented all your references?
	Accept you used in text citations every fourth dimension they were needed? Accept you formatted all your citations correctly?
	Is your references' section consummate and correct according to the JIBC APA Style Guide.
2nd Revision 3 : Mechanics
___ ___	Check that all words and sentences are punctuated according to standard usage.
	Check for spelling and typographical errors.
Third Revision: Content
___ ___ ___ ___	Read your essay aloud. Practice you lot believe what you have written?
	At this point do you develop your controlling idea in a way that makes sense?
	Have you provided enough background information? Is it relevant/necessary?
	Have you primarily used paraphrasing equally opposed to direct quotations?

You should now be confident y'all accept produced a stiff statement that is wonderfully constructed and that yous will be able to persuade your audience that your points and point of view are valid.

Primal Takeaways

• During revising, you add, cut, move, or modify data in order to improve content.
• During editing, you have a second look at the words and sentences you used to express your ideas and fix whatever problems in grammar, punctuation, and sentence structure.
• Remember to budget time for careful editing and proofreading. Use all available resources, including editing checklists, peer editing, and your institution's writing lab, to ameliorate your editing skills.
• Organisation in a research paper ways that the argument gain logically from the introduction to the trunk to the conclusion. It flows logically from one betoken to the adjacent. When revising a inquiry paper, evaluate the organisation of the newspaper as a whole and the organization of individual paragraphs.
• In a cohesive inquiry paper, the elements of the newspaper work together smoothly and naturally. When revising a research paper, evaluate its cohesion. In item, cheque that information from inquiry is smoothly integrated with your ideas.
• An effective research paper uses a fashion and tone that are appropriately academic and serious. When revising a research paper, check that the manner and tone are consistent throughout.
• Editing a research newspaper involves checking for errors in grammar, mechanics, punctuation, usage, spelling, citations, and formatting.

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Source: https://opentextbc.ca/writingforsuccess/chapter/chapter-12-peer-review-and-final-revisions/

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